Faith Over Chaos

I used to sit in the middle of the mess and think, “How did I end up here?” This trial, this chaos—it had to be something I did, right? So, I’d start the spiritual spring cleaning. “Okay God, what do I need to sweep out? What hidden leaven is lurking in the corners of my life?” Like the Jews prepping for Passover, I’d go full spiritual detective—hunting for crumbs of compromise like they were hiding behind the couch cushions. Maybe I’ll save that reference for Easter season next time—but when you know, you know. Sometimes the soul just starts scrubbing early. Sometimes it grabs a broom, a flashlight, and a guilt complex and goes to town. And listen—I was great at telling other people, “Maybe this chaos is God building character in you. Maybe He’s growing you, maturing you.” You know, like in James 1. Here we go another post it note ready to go.

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” — James 1:2–4 (NIV)

I could quote that verse like a spiritual coach ready to make you do laps around the sanctuary with a Post-it note on your forehead that says “PERSEVERANCE BUILDS CHARACTER.”

But when the mess landed in my own lap? Suddenly I wasn’t so sure. Suddenly the joy felt less “pure” and more “please make it stop.” So how do we know what kind of mess we’re in?

We bring the conversation to Him. We ask. We probe. “Okay God, here I am. What next?” Is this a growth season or a clean-up season? A pruning or a planting? Sometimes we know right away. Sometimes we don’t. Sometimes we just need to ask—and maybe cry a little while we do. Because not every mess is a mistake. Not every storm is a rebuke. Occasionally it’s just God doing deep work in hidden places—like spiritual grout cleaning. (And let’s be honest, nobody volunteers for that job.) Paul reminds us of this even as he’s unpacking justification:

“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Romans 5:3-5 (NIV)

I’ll admit it—these verses make me sigh. I don’t wake up hoping for trials, tribulations, or suffering. I’m not out here asking for spiritual boot camp or a character-building obstacle course. But I do want closeness to my Heavenly Father. I want to know Him more. I want to be shaped, matured, and filled with hope. And if that means walking through the mess, sitting in the ache, or letting go of what I thought I needed— then Lord, help me trust You in it. Not because I love the pain. But because I love You. And I believe You’re doing something deeper than I can see. Even if it feels like spiritual CrossFit.

Helping you find peace in the garden again—because even spiritual boot camp needs a shady spot and a snack.

Let’s sit with the mess for a minute.
Let’s ask the questions that help us hear what God might be whispering in the middle of it.

1. What’s my go-to reaction when chaos hits—cleaning, coaching, or crying in the car?
2. Is this season about pruning or planting—or am I just trying to survive it?
3. Where do I feel resistance to growth, and what might God be gently nudging me toward?
4. Have I mistaken discomfort for punishment, when it might be preparation?
5. If I stopped trying to fix everything, what might I hear from the Holy Spirit instead?